New:Luther BBC1:Episode 2 Series 2 Aired Last Week:21st June 2011:Warning Contains Spoilers

This programmed contains scenes some viewers might find disturbing.
(That’s me)

Daft Opening Song:
“Love is like a sin my love.
For the ones that feel it the most.
Look at her with eyes like a flame.
She will love you like a fly will never love you.”

(A Fly, are you sure?!)
Very daft. Is it about Alice?

Luther Episode 2: A (silly) Synopsis Through Dialogue and scene notes:Do not Read if not seen this episode:Contains spoilers

Justin (Ripley)
Is in the dungeon. For once it’s a man in the dark and drippy dungeon.

Cameron (murderer)
Comes along with a blow torch, then a red hot poker. Things are not looking good for Ripley. (I didn’t look).

Murderer’s Artwork:
Is called the Integrated Personality.

(studying this work)
“His work is in empty rooms, and now Ripley, empty car”!
“Heel springed Jack dissapeared too! He’s going to dissapear and haunt us”!.

Luther went into a free form genius brainstorming session hunched in an office chair thinking furiously.
(hunched because the chair’s too small)

The murderer rings:
“Shut up everybody, it’s Ripley’s phone!”
“Sorry i hurt your puppy”…
Luther hangs up. (It’s his genius plan)
“Don’t answer it,, he gets your attention, soon as he has it he doesn’t need Ripley”
“I will send you pictures of every burn, every cut, every have 10 seconds, one..”
Luther rips up the phone. (Luther is good at wrecking office stuff)

Glasses Man Boss Shenck:
“What if Pell (murderer) regards your silence as weakness and not strength?”
“He won’t”.

Murderer chatting to Ripley:
“You know the phrase the banality of evil? It’s bourgeois platitudes..We’ve got our myths, Crippen, Jack the Ripper. Murder transfigured them. Shadows cast depth, I’ve worked so hard to become a shadow”.
(err, ok..)

Oh No! (in another unconnected scene)
Luther gets a nail hammered through his hand into the table.

Evil Lady Caroline:
Like a lot of actresses now has weird lips.Luther pulls his hand out of the table. (Ugh. Plus a bit Jesus Christ and all that)

Paul Ex-Con in antique? Gun and Knife shop (antique since there are no gun & knife shops in London)

“Morning officer”! to Desire, young new recruit, in plain clothes.
“Well i am familiar with the species!”
“Seriously mein herr, would you like to see my papers?”

Murderer to Ripley:
(still held in dungeon)
“Do they know where it goes next?. Do you know where it goes next?”
“I’d love to know where it goes next”!
(So would we all)

Back to scene with Evil Caroline&Luther:
“Do you want out?”
“Of what?”
“Of this”!.
“Are you lying?”
“No, I’m not”!.

nb. A Croatian guy has an Irish accent!

Luther and Paul (his dead ex-wife’s fiance) in front of Paul’s Pad:
Where did they find an old warehouse with wooden Dutch filigree shutters painted orange red in London? Faded in an impossibly chic manner
Get Jennifer (Evil Caroline’s daughter Luther rescued) out of the boot of the car and wrap her up in a rug. Jennifer hugs Luther around the waist for ages. (Any higher would be difficult) He looks embarrassed. Ahh.

The Spectacled Boss is Scary.
Shenck when questioning a suspect:Shenck’s Interview technique:
“I know men like you like you know men like me, guess what, it’s come down on you like the hand of God. Then the tonnage and velocity of shit that’s coming down on you”!
Shenck also tells the suspect that he knows he’s lying since there’s a tell at the corner of his mouth. Sure..

Ripley flatters the Murderer (still in the dungeon)
“You really want to know? I’m dying to tell you”..

Luther Muses In a Genius Way To Solve The Crime:
“It’s the opposite of an explosion, it’s an implosion, a black hole, evil at it’s most pure”..
(Luther goes all genius)
“Who do we protect and shield from all evils of the world?..He’s gonna hit children”!

Back To Ripley:
Ripley gets away-yey!
(From a noose, a plastic bag round his head and tied up)

(Sad violin music plays when the children are taken)

The Green Valley Industrial Park:
Luther in traffic:
“Move, move!” (Don’t tell me Luther is going to be late for this one? nb. Why doesn’t Luther have a police car or at least a stick on siren?)

The murderer, Cameron:
Uh oh he’s hooking in the sodium hydroxide as a gas? One kid gets out of the van whilst all the rest scream and knock..He looks like he’s from All About A Boy)

Luther & The Murderer face to face plus the escaped boy:
Luther asks the boy what’s your name? (ignores murderer)
Luther throws the murderers mask away. (clever)
“You can’t do it without this!” (duh)
Luther leads the children out like the Pied Piper.

Shenck Bespectacled Boss & Luther:
Shenck to Luther;
“Oh, yes, you did outstanding work”!
“Yes, so did you, the corner of the mouth huh?”
“Yes, a lie I’ve been telling since 1999!”(Yes we guessed that)

Luther comes to meet the Beautiful Caroline:
(Why Luther is doing her favours in the first place is not clear)

Luther finally returns home to his Council flat:
“Busy day?”
(In Luther’s flat of course, my mate was right, Luther managed to fit a whole pass key into the apple)
Alice picks up Luther’s gun:
“And there’s only one bullet?”

Alice On The Run:
“They’re Wiley Coyote and i’m the Roadrunner. There’s an entire alphabet to work through;there’s Morocco, Marrakech, Monte Carlo and that’s just the M’s”..
“We’re Yin & Yang, Bonnie & Clyde..come with me, just with me”..
(She talks to him like she’s the snake in Jungle Book)

“You have to leave, I know you want to, you have a tell tale heart”.( Alice holds her hand over Luther’s chest)
“Have you ever eaten Fungi from a puffer fish? It’s fatal if not digested properly, delicious!” (she licks her lips)

Alice kisses Luther several times (lingeringly on the cheek) and walks away.
Luther sighs deeply and looks sad.
(thought they might, but phew they didn’t, too cringe worthy for words)

Luther goes to get Jennifer (from evil Caroline her Mother) i knew he would:
“Come on!” (from the ground outside, Jennifer looking down forlorn from her window)
“John!” (He says to himself)
(Don’t tell me she finds the gun, hope not)

Ending Song:
Joan The Policewoman sings (ha ha)
“Show me lover, all the things you see, all the apples you find”!
(another odd song)

all a bit incomprehensible
decidedly daft
gloriously silly

One reviewer said Luther was “incredible”. Which is a good word, nicely describing the ludicrous unbelievable plots, storyline and dialogue. Still we don’t care we love Luther. It just requires a temporary suspension of belief whilst watching it.

Plus it’s in London for a change. Yey. Cue lovely old derelict warehouses and impossibly chic Riverside Warehouse flats of a million odd quid. With flowers inside. That Paul McGann lives in. Then there’s the rare and unusual sight of the inside of an old 70’s decorated London Council flat. In the tallest tower block. (Doesn’t Luther get paid much?)

Amidst it’s fellow elephantine twinkling towers in the depths of the dark city night..

And:not one obligatory sighting of the Gherkin building to be seen. Hallelujah.

nb. Whatever happened to Luther’s original boss? The rude and straight talking over done Cockney accented Saskia Reeves. She was cool..