Legends Pilot episode and Episode Two. MInor spoilers only. On in the UK on Sky1 or Channel number 109 on Virgin Media TV Thursdays @10pm

Legends Sky 1

Pilot Episode

The scene opens on:
The Citizen’s Army of Virginia.  It is Sean Bean! looking most odd.  The other guy, the militia man, has a simply enormous black moustache.  He looks like an English soldier from World War One.

Sean:
“Easy boys..”
then:
“Echo Zulu Foxtrot!”

Opening Credits:
In undercover government work..”

meanwhile.
Sean:
“Grenade!”  He leaps out of the door with another man in tow. (somehow)

Man looks up at Sean from the ground.
Man:
“Who are you?!”
Sean:
(Like some superhero)
“Martin, Martin Odum..”

The Federal Bureau of Investigation.

The dialogue is a bit leaden.

So I nearly ditched on Legends but did I mention it has Sean Bean in it, hamming it up something rotten. Then there are the cool typewritten credits.

I spot the tiresome device of getting the otherwise woman Detective in this case a high ranking square jawed controller of Sean: into a hooker’s outfit.

 (In this case before she could barely blink Sean’s controller is spirited into a lap-dancing booth.  Baby doll nightie on and handy velvet blue dressing gown nearby.  I guess she has to pack this stuff.  who knows.  is there a special drawer for it down at the Polis station)

I am not sure exactly who or what cancels each other out in Legends: the wildly overacted “legend” or personality of Sean Bean or the somehow nullifyingly leaden generic stereotype of F.B.I procedural drama.  Mostly.

Taken separately, Sean and the dreary framework of a show: obviously I would watch Sean every time.  Despite an intriguing story line and classic retro paranoia sub-plot involving a homeless hooded black guy who tells Martin that he is not really Martin Odum: Legends is sadly flat.

Still.  I could probably watch Sean Bean all day.  In a baked bean advert.  Acting his socks off as per usual.

Seeing Sean Bean in sort of stereotype land is just so wrong really.  So very wrong.

***
end of pilot episode, episode one.
***

Legends episode Two.

Sean goes to places called: The Tzar bar with really cool sunglasses on.

Sean, playing Russian roulette with a guy’s testicles:
“Future progeny on the line, I like it”
(he likes his own line)
“Dimitri!” shouts out the guy, in terror.

In this episode Sean tells his Boss: (unwisely or not we do not know)
Sean:
“He (the mysterious hooded black guy)
“He told me I am not who I think I am, that I am not who I think I am”..

I like the interplay between Sean and the tall black Detective Sean meets.
Detective:
“You do not know this about me, but I do not drop the ball..”

In this episode Sean’s boss controller lady is again forced to don evening gown and is shown as a leg, with a black high heeled shoe as she gets out of the car.

Sean’s controller, well her job is to just to be flirty and agree to go:
“into the office “
with the guy she is buttering up.  Oh and there are about five other men in the room.  This is not good.  Not good at all.

 Although she has exited swiftly to the ladies.  All hell is breaking loose:
 Kerblamm, Kerblamm.  Here comes Sean to rescue her.

Finally, Boss lady controller gets to Blamm a few guys.

Sean to Police Chief boss on the rooftop.
Police Chief:
“We have twelve hours until V6 gas is released!”
(or summat)
Sean or rather Martin Odun:
“I need to go undercover..”
Police Chief: (looking at Martin)
Dante, the Lord of Death..”
later.
(here comes)
Dante Aurelbach, British arms dealer…

***

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