Note to my readers:updates on Maison Close, Hard, Arrow, Southland, Moon, Things i watched but couldn’t get those hours back, The Girl with the Dragon tattoo, The House I live In and new Series of Revenge

Note to my Readers.

Update on Maison Close and Hard Sky Arts 1 Virgin 281

Canna get bothered enough about anything at the moment to write about it .  That must be because none of it is that good.  Maison Close (see my review) is wavering between historical bonk-buster and the really good series i was thinking it might be.

Hard Sky Arts 1 Virgin Channel 281
 Hard is shaping up nicely.  No pun intended.  It continues to write itself.
Blindingly obvious that our  glimmeringly beautiful heroine Sophie, with her preraphaelite looks will soon be standing in for the porn actresses who have become so used to doing their thing in the porn films that they can’t act normally in her new film idea for” something tasteful”.  Plus Roy the rod is in it dressed as some green feathery Krpytonite cursed sex-obsessed monster.  Except that Rod doesn’t look monsterish at all.  Just rather sweet and we already know that he is funny.

Cue the slow melting of our heroine i predict at about the same time as she discards the throat bound Hermes scarves she wears French style but has the unwanted effect of wondering if she has really been assaulted and is hiding it.  Luckily this isn’t the case.

 Fairly obvious the new tasteful porn film that Sophie intends to make with the oh so serious script-writer set in the forest who wants the actresses to emote the smell and sight of the fallen leaves in autumn is going to become a break-out art house success.  I do predict..

& Hopefully our fair heroine Sophie will start smiling properly and have a real laugh with Roy the Rod and all will be well.  Even set up her own film company.  Oh wait, she already has one.  Well become the producer and director then.

Arrow moves channels:from Sky 1 to Sky 1 HD

In other news they have put the new series of Arrow on Sky 1 HD=no!  no, no, no, not Arrow, my favourite super-hero (see my reviews) with his green raccoon style eye shadow and hoodie for a disguise. His cries for help at night which apparently consist of eating jalapeños and chilli fries.  Clean cut American heroes just don’t get drunk you see.  Eating chili fries is as down and out as they get apparently.

Don’t ask me, it was in an episode.Arrow’s faithful aide, Dig comes down especially, having got a call from his sister in-law who runs the cafe’ that this eating  jalapeños and chilli fries that apparently signal a cry for help was going on..then of course Dig has to dispense his wise wisdom ’cause you see Arrow’s heart hasn’t quite melted yet..ah.

 Although Arrow did fall in love a bit with the Huntress and rather silly of him taught her some of his arrow shooting tricks but she turned out to be rather a ruthless murderess who wanted to kill her own Mafioso Dad for killing her fiance or summat like that.  So it was back to square one for Arrow. Huntress was only in there for a bit of faux egalitarianism consisting of kick ass-kung fu moves in leather cat women jumpsuit..

 Oh i must correct my previous claim that Arrow’s baldy step-Dad had an improbably British accent-my apologies.  he really is British.
Though he naturally is hamming the accent up a bit i reckon.  As Brits do for American shows.
Still, now that Arrow is getting officially in touch with his feelings there are even more tiresome meaningful moments so perhaps its a good thing i won’t be able to see it any more=boo hoo.

Southland
The new series of Southland, once so very good, is still wavering:fast at risk from becoming not just message serving but soppy too.  Cooper, my favourite character as readers of my original Southland reviews here will know, has a new partner in Lucy Liu, Officer Tang.

Fortunately just as I thought this was all getting too deep and meangiful and Cooper and Officer Tang
(who does seem a bit diddy to be a Policewoman but when you carry guns nearly as big as you are guess it don’t matter) were gettin way too chummy it transpires that Officer Tang may well have an evil streak.  Interesting..

Plus I am not going to give the game away with what is happening with best Women Detective ever Lydia but I do wish she would make her mind up soon.  I mean we have already had the stereotypical running scenes where we are waiting and watching for Lydi to fall to the floor and clutch her stomach and call for the “R.A bus”.  Thats already happened.  Clue:normally Lydia runs like the wind.

Oh and guess who Cooper’s ex-pain-killer addict Narcotics Anonymous sponsor is?  D’Angelo Barksdale from The Wire.  Both of them, Cooper and D’Angelo, (haven’t caught his Southland name yet) on screen together are pure gold.

Southland is slow moving and it takes a while to get enough together to write on it.  Suffice it to say that the episode starts with a shot that is then freeze-framed of some standing tableau of awfulness or anarchy that resulted from something that happened earlier in that day.  Then we go back in time to the beginning of that day when  all was sunny and bright.

 Well actually its mostly is sunny and bright, which is one of the main things i like about Southland, the Southern Los Angleles sunshine.  The shots of it in all its many varied forms are quite spectacular i feel. One episode , truly shocking it was, it rained.  No, it can’t rain in L.A…

The House I Live In More 4 Channel in The UK

Full length Documentary film on America’s war on drugs by Eugene Jarecki.  Really good i thought although missed a fair bit of the beginning.  Very interesting and shocking too.  Seems to have been researched, very thoroughly, by an long white-bearded man who speaks from time to time.  Also commentary from David Simon the writer of The Wire, a prison Guard and lots of Narcotic Cops.  No picnic.  There is a Judge too, who doesn’t want to keep giving out maximum for minimum sentences however can do nothing about it.

Shame that More 4 hardly does Documentaries any more.  Since Current TV disappeared from UK screens, which had documentaries 24/7, there has been a bit of a dearth of good Documentaries.

Best Things i have seen lately:
Moon

The Film Moon is written by David Bowie’s son Duncan Jones.
(Guess he changed his name from Zowie Bowie)  Warning if you prefer happy endings:it’s both happy and sad.  Plus it may keep you up half the night figuring out various conundrums in the plot.

The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo Trilogy-The Scandinavian one.

OK it’s not brilliant i will admit that its a bit like watching several episodes of Swedish Wallander, the best ones with Henrik in, not Rolf.  However Lisbeth Salander has to go down in my hall of fame of best heroines ever.  Probably kicking Sarah Lund off the top spot, and now equal to Michonne from The Walking Dead.

The Tove Jansen Story BBC4 Over Christmas

Again, no picnic and possibly quite upsetting for Moomintroll fans the world over.  Still worth seeing though for all the background and detail to the books and the rather sad but eventually happy, life of Tove Jansen herself.

Things i wished i hadn’t watched but then i couldn’t get those hours back:
I am Love
 with Tilda Swinton in it.

Do not bother. You will stay stuck to your seat, convinced, like me that it must be good because the review said so and it has this fabulous house, with fabulous scenery and fabulous but curiously blank-faced Tilda Swinton it it who apparently can talk fluent Italian, since its all in Italian.  However you sit through it all for nothing and to cap it all it has a horrible tragic ending.

The Good news is:
Revenge

Revenge is back=yey! great non-fluffy fun with yet another unsmiling yet deadly heroine.  For all those who might have missed this tour-de-force that was even voted as best guilty pleasure of the year in The Independent (who knew anyone else was watching it?!) there is an update episode voiced by Nolan, previously skinny blond billionaire buddy of Emily Thorne who has, since his horrible kidnap in the dungeon with Emily, taken to boxing and the show has made him wander about a boxing ring with his shirt off.

 Yes, Nolan now has a quadruple six-pack which would be a 24 pack.   I never did get the whole six pack thing or its more numerically advanced cousins. It just looks like something went dreadfully wrong with some rubber bands.

Poor Nolan, just because he was a bit skinny apparently the show has to decide that he must go buff and henceforth parade around in flowery shorts when before Nolan has an ultra-cool man From Uncle meets the Modfather style going on.  All polo-necks and pastel slacks.  The sort of outfits that Howard from the big Bang Theory thinks he’s wearing..

Look out for Madeline Stowe channelling just about every evil plotting Dynasty like heroine ever (the reviewer mentioned Bette Davis=wow!) who is not dead after all:just as i predicted!  She must have parachuted out of that 747 just before it blew up over the ocean.  Guess it was just too bad for the lover of Madeline’s  husband who Madeline Stowe had persuaded to run away for her own safety on the plane with her..

Liked it? Take a second to support Clarissima on Patreon!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *